…you can learn the most wonderful things!
When I get bored at work, I will occasionally pop onto the site to read up on a particular subject. Today’s featured topic is ‘The Simpsons’, so I had a read.
I discovered what Bart’s well-known catchphrase “Ay, Caramba!” actually means…
Here’s a little nugget I came across on the work Discussion Board:
London Times Obituary of the late Mr. Common Sense
‘Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who
has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was,
since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He
will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the
worm; Life isn’t always fair; and maybe it was my fault.Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don’t spend more
than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in
charge).His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but
overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy
charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended
from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for
reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the
job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly
children.It declined even further when schools were required to get parental
consent to administer sun lotion or an Elastoplast to a student.Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became
contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better
treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you
couldn’t defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar
could sue you for assault.Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to
realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in
her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his
wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He
is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now,
Someone Else Is To Blame, and I’m A Victim.Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If
you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do
nothing.’And a little extra……………………
Can you imagine working for a company that has a little more than 600
employees and has the following statistics?29 have been accused of spouse abuse
7 have been arrested for fraud
19 have been accused of writing bad cheques
117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses
3 have done time for assault
71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit
4 have been arrested on drug-related charges
8 have been arrested for shoplifting
21 are currently defendants in lawsuits
84 have been arrested for drink driving in the last year
Which organization is this?
It’s the 635 members of the House of Commons, the same group that cranks
out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us in
line.You Couldnt make it up could you
Well, I did it - I went a whole month without making a single post on my blog…
Ho hum.
I’m sitting in my room, it’s Friday night, half past eleven, and I’m listening to ‘Live Over Europe’, the CD of Genesis Reunion Tour they did this year.
Genesis have been my favourite band for the last fifteen years at least (Spock’s Beard are currently giving them a serious run for their money at the mo, but I will give it a few years before I make an actual decision on that score). Last year or the year before, a rumour started on the internet that they were going to reunite for a gig. I would pay any amount of money to see that, so I was naturally very excited.
Then it turned out that the reunion rumours were true, but that it was to consist of Phil, Tony and Mike - the latter years lineup. No Peter Gabriel, no Steve Hackett.
Shit, thought I - there’s no point in going then. The five of them together acheived pinnacles of musical creativity almost unrivalled, but after Peter and Steve left, they lapsed into mediocrity. Don’t get me wrong, they still made good songs, but nothing really to touch the dizzying heights of ‘Firth of Fifth’ or ‘Suppers Ready’ for example (except for the beginning and end of Duke and the end of Fading Lights maybe). I elected not to pursue tickets.
After it was too late to get tickets (they sold out quite quickly), I thought that maybe I had erred in my decision. Yeah, it was not the original lineup, but it was still most of Genesis, and they were bound to play a fair few of their older songs. Besides, it was probably the only time I would get to see them anyway, as the possibility of the classic lineup reuniting was looking all but nonexistant (and still does).
Too late. I didn’t lose any sleep over it or anything.
So here I am, listening to an album of one of the concerts (Manchester, I believe), and to be honest………..I’m glad I didn’t bother.
Nine songs from the classic years, and three of those are lumped together into a medley (In The Cage, The Cinema Show, Duke’s Travels). They allow Firth of Fifth merely an excerpt… I Know What I Like - why do they keep dredging that one up? The Carpet Crawlers, done solely because they re-recordd it in ‘99. Ripples - they seem to have picked the least prog they could find.
Afterglow (one of my favourites), usually a lingering majestic closer to a set, has been lumped in the middle and given only a cursory run through.
I know that if I had gone to see it, I would have gotten all excited leading up to the gig, and come out with a broken heart. Listening to this album, it reminds me of how much they have abandoned their prog roots, as if they were ashamed of it, paying it lip service only because some of the fans want to hear it. Daryl Steurmer (I assume) slaughtering the guitar solo of Firth of Fifth with a load of unnecessary extra notes (I fucking hate it when he does that). Phil Collins churning out the same old bollocks with the crowd that he always does (I’m two thirds through the album and he hasn’t said a word to the crowd - he’s just done the ‘be da daaaaaaay’ stuff to Throwing It All Away that he’s done so many times before (This could have been just another gig from their ‘The Way We Walk’ Tour - what’s the point?). Tony Banks selects some really awful synth voices these days - this gig has no atmosphere (granted I’m listening to a CD recording, but still…). Oh, I am so glad I didn’t go. Talk about going through the motions.
To be able to see the five of them reunite for just one gig…To see Suppers Ready, Watcher of the Skies, Seven Stones, The Lamia, Dancing With The Moonlit Knight, Firth Of Fifth (I got a tear in my eye seeing Steve play that at a solo gig - imagine how I’d be seeing all five of them perform it again), The Musical Box, The Cinema Show, Dance on a Volcano, In That Quiet Earth, and what a mesmerising finale it would be to hear Peter give his voice to Afterglow as a finale (for the uninitiated, Afterglow was recorded after Peter left)…..now that would be a concert…